I follow you viciously into the gate I walk with conviction There’s no escape And it’s a part of your mission, me blinded alone No tight restriction of the body, but the mind pulls me on And it’s not Bright enough Loud enough for my self preservation to glean You’re really not a bad sign I just find no omen’s preventative at all for me I float animatedly into your storm My wisdom belatedly gives alarm “Follow me into the devil’s gate” offered in hush I greet mortality with patience I accept the hand of god And now here we are Bloody moon dimly casting the path to the portal in red The prophecy showed me far Years ago to this moment to illustrate embracing death I’m in its arms now Consumed so totally by its shroud I wouldn’t know where start clawing free But I’d never tap out And still the universe shows me how Aching for exhaustive arterial rush I’m summoned into the dome of the destruction “Follow me into the devil’s gate” offered in hush Crippling to your sacred mouth for initiation I’m too far Too involved in this moment to heed what lurks deep in my mind That’s really not who we are If you wanted me slaughtered I’d no longer be alive And I know you must love me You didn’t kill me in my sleep Intrusive murder fear fantasies And a plea Sickly desire for their physical manifestation Physically manifest I’m here to physically manifest To physically manifest I metaphysically manifest That’s not who we are Hurl into the jaw I’m here to appease you Not what we are You know I’ve made it this far Now don’t make me leave you That’s not (physically manifest) who we are Hurl into the jaw (I’m here to physically manifest) I’m here to appease you And that’s not (to physically manifest) what we are You know I’ve made it this far (I’m here to physically manifest) Now don’t make me leave you Okay

I’m just not dirty with the means Like you need me to be Your catharsis beckons me The difference is I’m so paranoid now Can’t be reckless with the means You expect it from me A glossy deer entity Wracked with an repugnant guilt Which is my hill of penance To me these tenants of sympathy are home And I’d never burn yours down now You promise you will protect me from physical violence So you can perpetrate it on me yourself And I know You’ll keep coming back every two years To strip away a new part of me Until there’s nothing left Oh I should learn how to say yes to you more So euphoric when I surrender My ego dissolves I’m just not dirty with the means Like you need me to be Your sickness enraptures me The issue is I’m so cynical now Can’t be blinded to the schemes But you beg me to see You just want what’s best for me It happens to be you baby When you get so jealous It’s just possessiveness But it feels like home And you know I’d never burn yours down now Reconciliation’s reckless You leave me headless Embalmed within your arms And you know I’d never fight your web now

My body’s eating itself I smell blood when I run Truly, you have been so warm and gracious with your love The frailty of the muscles in my head drowns any floundering reciprocation out Out of my grasp The caverns of my nostrils Stringy with depletion Flood with blood cells dizzy red How can I repay this debt? Devaluing and debasement would stroke me with loose familiarity And even comfort at that Your tenderness makes me ill with self hatred And your honesty wrings my neck Your gentleness smothers me with acrid horror again How can I repay this debt? How can I repay this debt? How can I repay this debt? How can I repay this debt? My psyche’s feeding itself Far too sharp to feel numb And my catharsis is placated vicariously through representation The frenzy of the value in my skin pleads for a handler to knead the sickness in Into my hands Into my hands Your neurosis violates me Flattens and stretches me Your nihilism opens up my throat Your futility forces down the apathy you stroked I’m not a dumping ground for noxious waste with which you appeal and affront and appease and plead me softly to digest And you should know Your tenderness makes me ill with self hatred And your honesty wrings my neck Your gentleness smothers me with acrid horror again And again And again How can I repay this debt? How can I repay this debt? How can I repay this debt? How can I repay this debt? Rock me into pacification I could use a minute to close my eyes My system calling "Get Down From There" The difference between a broken limb and death I’m barren and I’m unqualified Quietly marinating in my giddy malice alone A specific prescription of violence reserved for me Sorry if I’m coming off as deranged You mean the world to me You told me you understand what giddy malice means More than anyone ever could I believe you. Do you understand my ravenous self-destruction Do you cherish my floundering vulnerability To me these tenants of sickness are enrapturing In a platonic realm unfamiliar to consequence I would resist, and resist, and resist, as I do And fold into your hands of disease Your tenderness makes me ill with self hatred And your honesty wrings my neck Your gentleness smothers me with acrid horror again And again

You occupy again The temple of my skull Disarming guards with tender preservation tools My soul is wary but my body pays in full The lies expire my reality, but still It’s nice to have something to stand for It’s really lovely to have something to fight for It’s very human to have something to believe in even if that means you lie And I just take it like a puppy Cuz it’s nice to have something to live for It’s really vital to have someone to die for It’s very natural to have somebody to hold your hand and yeah that means You grip and pull I take it like a puppy baby You slide your fingers into recesses of pain I open crack by crack to let you peek within My body houses everything weak and inane And I crave silence from myself when you slip in It’s nice to have something to look for It’s really lovely to have something to work for It’s very crucial to have somebody to trust in even if that means you fight And I just lick you like a puppy Cuz it's nice to have something to lean on It’s so required to have someone to dream of It’s so essential to have somebody to pull the wool And yeah that means my eyes are fried I take it like a puppy baby I wanna be home again I beg your claws to extract seemingly infinite grasp I didn't see my life going anywhere with you Or nowhere but your parents' basement You know, you thought I was resentful, and darling that was true Because my lust turned into latent hatred It’s really just like what you feared I didn’t want you Most of all, you sold me on the meagerness of your worth You piss on everything in a desperate attempt to claim it but your piss comes out slow in orange bursts You’re too old to play this game with me And if you fuck her like you fucked us there’s no lesson to be taught Because my Texas love will force you to see It’s kinda difficult to coax us into feeling for you When there’s the barrel of a gun in your mouth (Yeah it's her discretion, but she's violent) Maybe I’d understand your victimhood and struggle more if your brains were out for examination on the couch It’s nice to have someone to scapegoat It’s really lovely to have something to misquote It’s very vital to have somebody to carry out the violence while you cry And I just take it like a puppy Cuz it’s nice to have someone to pound on It’s so essential to be callous and withdrawn It’s so superior to bask in divination and my reverie You snarl, you whine, you take it like a puppy baby

You want my body with rumination I can do that The only entry you crave is sacred Invitation intact He’s a special treasure of a man How he entombs me Swallowed by the cradle of his hand Pulled deeper smoothly Tumbling on the ride Till limbs are lost or someone dies I’m here to test your strength tonight Shielded by love we only glide I always come back to you You open softly gates of my nation I can go slack The touch is gentle The grip is loving I’ve never felt it like that He’s a special treasure of a man How he entombs me Cherished like an angel in his land He’ll never lose me Flailing in the tide Till limbs are lost or someone dies I’m here to usher in the light Shielded by love we only glide I always come back to you I always come back to you I always come back to you Your claws are locked in my neck We find each other in every lifetime My soul is sewn on your sleeve I always come back to you Your teeth are deep in my heart We find each other in every lifetime My openness you retrieve I always come back to you My presence gushing its mark We find each other in every lifetime My tunnel spelling your name I always come back to you Your guardedness I depart We find each other in every lifetime In every life we embrace